Stories from the Classroom at the End of the Hall
by silvershadowrebel
Summary: Just a collection of stories and quotes from my band class. T because there may be a few sexual references. You know what I mean!
1. Chapter 1

**Aloha, guys. Silver here. So I got this idea from PiGirl19. This is just a bunch of things that have happened in my band class (and outside!)**

**I hope you guys enjoy!**

**Wow, this is nice not putting a disclaimer… ;)**

**Here's a key for m shorthand:**

**Band Director: BD**

**Drummer/ Percussionist: DR**

**The band as a whole: Us**

**I may add more, but that's it for now!**

James (DR): (wearing a headband with antlers) "Who's _is_ this?"

BD: "He's the only kid who gets a refund for this past Disney trip payment."

Us: "Yeah!"

BD: "$7.09"

James: "Will you write it in a check?"

BD: And now, the bane of our existence: Great Songs of Christmas!

Us: groans.

In my school, the music and theater department is one hallway. The choir room is across the hall from the band room.

BD: "Sing the notes in this piece. If you can't sing it, you can't play it."

Me: "There's a reason we're _here_, and not across the hall."

(During out town's parade) We stopped in front of the Municipal Building. BD was walking among us making sure our lines weren't a complete disaster.

My friend: "Why are we stopped?"

BD: shrugs.

DR: "I think we're waiting for the old people. They're late, as usual."

BD: "Oh, yeah, isn't the Senior tent only for people ninety five and older?"

My friend: "No wonder there's no one there!"

We were practicing marching for the parade. The brass sounded like crap, as per usual.

BD: "Brass! Get inside now!" They walk off, joking around.

Sam (DR): "Well, we just lost a third of our band." We continued "marching". We sounded like crap.

BD: "Everyone! Get inside NOW!"

James: "So you make us march to the farthes possible place away from the school to send us back? Wow. Just wow. We are so breaking up."

BD: "That's the first time I've ever sent somebody _into_ the classroom."

We were at our holiday concert, and there was one sax player missing, so we couldn't begin playing.

BD: (whispers) "Guys! Where's Nick?"

We look around. He's nowhere in sight. BD: "Is he behind the stage?"

Sam: (looks) "Yup."

Nick comes running out. "Sorry guys. I thought we weren't going until later. My bad."

On the first day, we were practicing pep band music.

BD: (stops the playing) "James. That was terrible! Even your sister is doing better."

Us: "Ooh!"

Kelly (James's sister): "I'm sorry! I wasn't trying!"

Us: "OOOOHH!"

James: "Okay. That's it." He stands up, and another drummer opens the door for him. He walks out and pretends to cry.

BD cuts us off. "Trumpets! How do you play a G sharp?" (I think it was a G sharp)

Trumpets: (cricket... cricket...)

BD: "Somebody go to the wall of shame, then report back to us what you discover."

Trumpeter: "It's this one." (points at middle finger)

BD: (nodding) "Exactly. That's why I couldn't demonstrate it for you, no matter how much I wanted to."

BD walks in with a mug full of popcorn. James and another drummer are begging for some. BD refuses. James steals BD's music and runs off.

BD: "I hope he knows that burning that is a felony." Continues eating popcorn.

James returns looking smug.

BD: "Where's my music?"

James: "I don't know. I guess we can't practice today."

BD glares at James and stands up. Then he turns around and grabs his mug of popcorn, watching James. He leaves the room. He returns carrying this massive box full of popcorn and begins eating it in front of James. Then he pauses. "Is Al still looking for my music?" He looks at James. "You'd better go get it for him. I wouldn't want him to get lost. Oh, and take the popcorn back to my office."

When BD isn't looking, James sneaks some popcorn.

After class, we hear someone screaming. We go to BD's office. Mr. L, the choir director, is barricading the door, blocking the drummer from before. He's stuffing popcorn into his mouth.

Mr L: "Thief! There's a thief! Popcorn thief!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Look who's back! Yup. Some swears and drug references in this chappie.**

**Enjoy!**

BD: "Oh! You guys don't know what I'm talking about, do you? It's called a hemiola."

James: "You have _what _kind of disease?"

* * *

In my school you're not supposed to have your phone on. Of course, no one listens to that rule. All of the percussion instruments are in the back of the band room, on a raised level, so if you sit down behind the timpani, the band director can't see you. So one day, James and Sam lied down behind the timpani and took a snapchat of them leaning in to kiss and sent it to BD.

BD: (smirks) "You know, the funny thing about snapchat is that the pictures don't actually disappear. You can take a screen shot of it." (shows us the pic) "And now I can blackmail you if you misbehave in class! Sam, your mom's email is ******** shrewsbury. ma. us, right?"

Sam: "No it's not."

BD: "She works for the public schools, right? Everyone got new addresses this year."

Sam: "Yeah but she doesn't use it."

BD: "Then what is it?"

Sam: (gives him the correct address)

BD: "Thank you!"

Sam: "Shit!"

* * *

We were talking about our trip to Disney:

BD: "Don't try to bring anything on the trip. Because not only will you have to get through us, but you also have to get through airport security. We will not be helping you get out of that. And then you'll be known as the idiot who tried to bring alcohol on the school trip. Like the kid who stored marijuana in the bathroom ceiling."

Us: "_What_?"

BD: "It was a couple of years before I came here. Mr. Marks walked into the bathroom in the dressing room across the hall, and there was this kid who was standing on the toilet with his hand in the ceiling. Mr. Marks was like, 'what are you doing?' and the kid goes, 'I thought I heard someone in the ceiling, so I went to check'. So Mr. Marks goes, 'kid, get down.' I mean, he could have at least locked the door."

* * *

We had to do an assessment of our holiday concert, so we were allowed to sit wherever we wanted. Sam and James sat together, and Maddie, Kelsey, and I sat with this awesome senior, Raj.

BD: "Sam, you are not sitting with James. God knows what will happen. And Raj, you are not sitting with the girls. You flirt too much."

* * *

I was twirling my flute before class began, and it hit the chair next to me. Hard.

BD: "I'm going to pretend I didn't see or hear that."

* * *

Raj's famous line is "Fight me!". And he gets really close when he says it. Like, your body is pressed up against his unless you back away.

Raj: "Fight me!"

Ronnie: "You know one of these days, somebody will fight you."

Raj: "Yeah. Yeah. Fight me."

Ronnie: (goes to punch him in the face and he stops her hand in midair.)

Later...

Raj: "Fight me!"

Kelsey: (begins punching him in the stomach. Raj doesn't move)

Raj: "What am I, your punching bag?"

* * *

At one of the football games, the BD wasn't there. Nick was in charge. The other team had decided to bring their cheerleaders _and _their pep band _and _their fans _and _their color guard (we don't even have a color guard). It was a battle of the bands to see who would get to play more. They also stole several of our songs.

Me: "Why are they playing? We just got a touchdown!"

Nick: "We need to show them."

Maddie: "Let's just play over them."

At half time...

Nick: "Let's do _I Fink U Freaky_."

We play, and at the same time, the other team's band starts playing. When we finish, we realize they're playing Gangnam Style.

Me: "Why do they get to do the cool songs?"

Nick: (starts doing the dance)

Maddie: "Traitor!"

* * *

My high school is the Revolutionaries, and the other team is the Konkows (you know, the Native American tribe). The football teams played the week before Thanksgiving.

BD: "Hey, do you realize it's the Revolutionaries versus the Konkows? Like, pioneers versus Indians?""

James: "And its before Thanksgiving!"

Me: (deadpanned) "How ironic."

**Review!**

**-Silver out.**


	3. Boston

Hey guys. So this is not an update, obviously. I just want to talk about the Boston bombings today.

I was at my friend's house watching Iron Man (who's psyched for Iron Man 3!) when my friend got a text from another friend. Her brother had a restaurant in Boston, and the the first two bombs went off right next to it. At first I didn't believe it. It's sad to think that you can't do anything anymore without getting injured or killed.

A bunch of people I knew were in Boston for the marathon (thankfully they're okay), but many people got hurt.

To those who died, rest in peace.

Happy Patriots Day, guys.


	4. Chapter 4

(BD was talking about how we were getting our instruments down to Disney for out trip)

BD: "All instruments will be going on the truck. No exceptions. No flutes. No sticks. No tubas. Got it?"

Me: "What do they expect us to do, hijack the planes with our instruments? _Everybody get down! I have a flute and I know how to use it!"_

Louis (DR): "Wait, how does the truck got down there? Will it fly?"

(cricket... cricket...)

BD: (with a complete poker face) "Yes. The truck will grow wings. _And then it will attach horses to the front. _AND THEN A _TRUCK_ WILL FLY DOWN TO DISNEY. Are you sure you graduated kindergarten?"

* * *

(We were working on this Mary Poppins medley, and James had sat down in the back of the room.)

BD: "Okay, everyone. Let's do this again."

(We start playing and BD starts walking to the back of the room. There's this massive CRASH! of cymbals and all the percussionists erupt into laughter. We continue playing.)

BD: "Guys. _Guys. _GUYS! STOP PLAYING!"

We stop. James had fallen asleep and BD had woken him up with the cymbals.

* * *

(We had an after school rehearsal before we left for Disney. Afterwards, a bunch of us were hanging out in the cafeteria.)

Raj: (sits down at a table with some other people and starts playing his guitar and singing) "What do you guys want me to play?"

Us: "..."

Raj: "Wow, you guys are hopeless." (sings a song he wrote)

Random girl: "That was really cool. I've never played that chord before."

(They talk for a while)

Random Girl: "I have to go now. You're really good on the guitar." (She starts walking away)

Raj: "Wait! What's you're name?"

Girl: "Annie."

Raj: "Okay. Bye, Annie!"

* * *

BD: "Because the spring musical is doing an in school performance, they will be using the band room to change. Which means we will not be in here. It's kind of hard to play music while people are stripping."

James: "Are we having a study?"

BD: "Yes, we are having a common study. Which means we will be in the commons. Which means you can't ask for a pass to the media center, or the science lab, or the history lab, or th math lab, or the meth lab..."

James: "Did someone just say meth?"

* * *

BD: (to percussionists) "Guys. BE QUIET! We are inside. Do not use your outdoor playing voices."

Some random percussionist: "But you're always telling them to play louder" (gestures at rest of the band)

BD: "Because their loud is your soft. And they aren't as obnoxious as you."

Us: "Oooohhh..."

BD: "And they have harder stuff to play. You guys just have two notes." (draws a quarter note and a quarter rest. Underneath he writes BOOM and NO BOOM). "See? Boom, or no boom. Actually, you only have one note. Boom."

Emma: "But then there's like the Crashy Boom, and the Rolly Boom, and and Big Boom, and Little Boom..."

* * *

(BD had dissed James, and James had walked out of the classroom again.)

BD: "Quick! Someone throw me one of his mallets!" (he uses it to conduct)

(James walks back in and the percussionists start the cadence. At the end of it:)

BD: "That was the worst quad playing I have ever heard in my life!"

James: "Well you try playing it with only one mallet!"

* * *

(The choir that has class the same period tends to do some strange things. That day they were walking around with furniture from the teachers lounge and an indoor potted tree.)

Mason (bari sax): You know, we should have a battle of the C wing. Choir against band."

James: "Yeah, we could give everybody Styrofoam weapons and line up at opposite ends of the football field and charge each other. And repeat until no one is alive!:"

Mason: "Why give them weapons? We have our own." (points to instrument)

* * *

(At the end of class we were in the hallway practicing on marching. The choir kids usually hang out in the hallway )

Choir Kid: "Oh my God! What are all these people doing!"

Friend: "This is so weird! They never come out of their classroom!"

Me (in my head in an annoying voice): "Oh my God! It's the apocalypse!"


End file.
